Cornhole
April 26, 2008 by chunque
Toss it in your Cornhole! What is Cornhole? Although it has been called many things - Corn Toss, Bean Bag, Bean Toss, Soft Horseshoes, Indiana Horseshoes, Salad Toss, Cincinnati Sphincter Stretch – for those who have grown up with the game, and avid newcomers alike, the sport is passionately referred to as Cornhole.
The origins of Cornhole are largely unknown. Some historians claim that the game was born in 14th century Germany and reinvented somewhere in the Cincinnati Tri-state area perhaps as long as 100 years ago. Others adhere to the theory that agricultural and ex-urban communities since the Stone Age spontaneously take up cornholing as a way to pass long and idle hours in the back shed. Although Cornhole enthusiasts can be heard to argue a number of theories, often based upon which side of the Ohio River they call home, one thing all can agree on is that the game is great fun for all ages and can be played anywhere!
The basic elements of strategy for cornhole are 1) buy a case or two of delicious beer — Natty Ice is traditional; 2) Lay hands on your bean bag; 3) grab a couple of friends and start cornholin’!
Midwestern d-bags have long known the salubrious effects of corn on your cornhole. Just as our pioneer forefathers used corn cobs for pipes and to scrape their nether parts immaculately clean, modern day corn enthusiasts celebrate the healthy properties of corn by feeding it to livestock, making it into sweet, sugary syrup to make any food more delicious, and turning it into fuel to ensure that no d-bag will ever be without a pick-up on the farm and NASCAR on the box.
What better way to ritually honor the humble cereal grain native to North America than to praise it in sport and song? Cornhole represents the traditional American values growing from the soil of our motherland: simplicity and truth , respect for the natural bounty of our nation, and a leisurely, don’t-sweat-the-small-stuff ethos that has made us world leaders in Cornholing. (I defy the Chinese or Muslims to be more energetic or effective cornholers!) And in the final analysis, you can only play so much fantasy football before your cornhole starts ichin’ for some action.
that’s awesome. I wish I knew anyone in the midwest, I would make a vacation out of this.
I thought that Beavis & Butthead invented the term Cornhole– I kid. Pretty informative however I have such a tained view of the term stuck in my vocabulary that have helped exile.
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