Talking points

Ignore the man behind the curtain!

Developing verbal skills is too much work for a d-bag. If it’s not a no-brainer, I don’t want any part of it! What’s more, critical reasoning and/or skepticism is for pussies. If you can’t chant it, forget it! Most of the time a d-bag can solve his problems the old-fashioned way — with his fists! But on occasion some weak-ass, know-it-all egg-head will use superior logic and a stronger grasp of reality (not to mention citable sources and good grammar) to disarm a d-bag — usually in front of people who might not have the d-bag’s back should a fight break out. (For example, when the d-bag is in a room full of TV cameras. Taking advantage of a d-bag in this way is a sure sign your enemy is a pussy.) For just such an emergency, the Ivy educated d-bags invented “talking points”.

Talking points are easy to remember. They often come in “bullet” form. This is why so many d-bags use Powerpoint to write instead of English. And more importantly, you can get them freshly updated every day from Fox News. No more worries! When someone starts asking embarrassing questions you can’t answer, shout them down with your talking points! Problem solved. It’s a no-brainer!